Holiday Grinch

Holidays confuse me, lately. Something I’ve been noticing on an ever increasing scale as I’ve grown up to be a childless, atheist mongrel pretty much disconnected from her entire family (save some exceptions). Rawr. I’m quite possibly a holiday-Grinch, I think.

You may not notice this about holidays, if you’re a person with a healthy family and home: but holidays don’t come naturally to everyone. Or at all. Because in order for holidays to become an actual integral part of your daily life (aka: you remembering when they are, marking them in agendas and actually celebrating them with festivities) they need to be an actual event in it. For me? They’re not.

Alright. I’ll admit. One day a year (on one of the Christmas days) I’ll have a dinner with the remainder of the family I do still speak to. And for NYE I’m usually strong-armed and/or lured into a festive state by a horde of friends or other social creatures. But all of the rest of these celebrations? Noperdinope.

This makes shopping trips particularly strange yet exciting. Because supermarkets seem to have an evil plot to confuse us non-celebrators even further. They start the celebration-specific gifts off SO MUCH sooner than the actual holiday that it is IMPOSSIBLE to remember when the ACTUAL holiday is supposed to be. (like marketing Mothers Days gifts a month earlier, creating Christmas Displays in October or (because we Dutch are the worst): putting Easter eggs and pepernoten on sale three months (!!!!) before their actual dates AT THE LEAST.)

I completely missed Sinterklaas last year. I mean, the goodies had been in the supermarkets for ages already, I don’t watch ‘Sinterklaas tv’ on the account of having no younger siblings or family members addicted to it, and I have no political interests in the ‘Zwarte Piet’ is racist discussions around the whole holiday. I only realized it was the 5th of December the Monday AFTER the 5th of December because colleagues were discussing how their ‘Pakjesavond’ (aka gift unwrapping) had been with the families. And I sat there like… OH. That was THIS weekend? WHOOPS! I have missed entire Easters, and Halloweens, Kings Days and ‘Bevrijdingsdag’ and ‘Hemelvaartsdag’ in a similar fashion. Not realizing the day was upon us, until well after the fact.

I mean. Usually…for instance: the only way I noticed that Easter being celebrated is the insane Easter egg discounts the week AFTER Easter, when the supermarkets are drowning us in their excesses. Not because I did anything for Lent. Or visited a church. Or spent time in the garden looking for hidden eggs and scantily clad hares toting baskets. OR I notice because one or several of the days are obligatory ‘free’ days from work. When I’m not expected or allowed to shop up for work and thus get to enjoy blissful freedom. Unexpectedly. Usually.

Colleague: ‘What are you going to do next weekend with the extra long weekend?’
Me: ‘Extra long weekend? Huh? Wha?’
Colleague: ‘Yeah. It’s ‘goede vrijdag’ and second day of Easter Monday. We have a four day weekend.’
Me: ‘Are you shitting me?’
#PARTYMODE.

But yeah. All of the Easter eggs, decorations in my neighbors window and the fact that it was marked in my work agenda (seriously, who checks that anyway) didn’t ring enough bells to land the celebration spirit in my brain. Which only (as if proof was needed) underlines the fact that most of these Holidays are JUST capitalist schemes to have us buy themed merchandise that we (and my waistline) definitely don’t need. Holidays confound me. Seriously.

Now please excuse me while I go binge on some more chocolate eggs. Nomnom.

13 thoughts on “Holiday Grinch

  1. Dance And Song
    Always My Holiday
    Void Of All Easter

    Church

    Dates

    To Fill

    Baskets

    With Money

    Nope

    Nakedism

    Don’t

    Transform

    Into Capitalism

    Religion of

    The

    “Wicked Witch
    West” Pandemic
    Spreading Zombie
    Eating Real Face

    Of God
    Nature

    Yuck

    Including
    Us In That
    “Soylent Green”

    Buck Ploy of Destruction🦠

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  2. I at least acknowledge and pay attention to holidays, but that probably has a lot to do with the way I see the world in terms of numbers and stuff like that. But, even though I live alone and don’t have a lot of big family holiday celebrations, I think it also has to do with whether or not the day has personal meaning to me. Christmas and Easter have personal meaning to me because of my Christian faith (and I do go visit my family on Christmas). July 4, Independence Day in the US, is important to me because I believe in the founding principles of this country, and it makes me sad how so many seem to have forgotten this without even realizing it. But holidays like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day tend to sneak up on me; I forget about them until I see or hear advertisements, although if you were to ask me when they were I’d be able to tell you. Nothing against my mother or father, but these just were never big celebrations in my family. And I know a lot of people who are aware of upcoming holidays because there are days off work or school, but these people could not even tell you the name of the holiday, let alone why it is celebrated.

    And I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with not celebrating holidays. Everyone is different.

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  3. Im an atheist as well but Easter is my best holiday!! The kids have a blast and that’s the only reason I do it besides that I’m obsessed with dyeing eggs. Other than that tho I am boycotting some holidays this year.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. After my mother passed away, I went to visit a friend in the US. It was Halloween while I was there, and this involved a visit to a haunted cornfield where a guy chased me with a chainsaw.
    Ever since then, I have tended to feel running at things with a chainsaw adds a certain simplicity to holidays.

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  5. Definitely don’t need more. Seems they keep inventing new ones, however. When I came to The Netherlands as a child, I had to explain what Halloween was, Valentine’s Day et cetera. In the meantime….

    Like

  6. Lees is More! 😉

    Or, as Antoine de Saint Exupery once said: “La perfection est atteinte, non pas lorsqu’il n’y a plus rien à ajouter, mais lorsqu’il n’y a plus rien à retirer.”

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  7. I agree that holidays are way too expensive and mostly unnecessary, i used to send out so many Christmas cards but now only a select few get them and i haven’t brought a Easter egg in years, since my children all became adults, oh by the way can I just remind you of a promise of a photo of you in Easter bunny ears lol lol you dont have too really, but would be kind of fun to see that lol lol anyways have yourself a lovely fantastic Easter weekend my lovely blog friend, unfortunately i will be working on that weekend.

    Like

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