Can you relate?
Sometimes I watch things that are SO painfully accurate for my life that I just sit there nodding my head: ‘Yup. That’sa me.’
And coincidentally: that’s recognition is VERY rarely a positive occasions. It’s usually the painful ‘Oh god. Preach.’
Iliza says it perfectly (and a lot more fun when you actually watch the clip, mind you):
‘There’s a pinnacle of attractiveness that every woman is capable of reaching. Meaning once we’ve gotten ready there’s a point where we’re done and we ain’t getting any hotter. Okay?!‘
I almost died at that point. Because it’s SO DAMN ON POINT.
And as I installed myself in front of my mirror today, trying to glue on a face that was capable of being taken into the outside world – I LAPSED INTO THAT SAME ERROR. I kept going. After I was already done.
Big. Fucking. Mistake.
I can NOT count the times where, after applying a great basic pretty layer of make-up I ventured back into the bathroom for a 15th time, ‘since I still have ten minutes before I have to leave‘ and THEN (and only then) deciding that a RAD color of lipliner with added lipstick would make total sense. Let me tell you. I ain’t made for lip-embellishment. Not in the applying, nor in the wearing of it. BUT I FALL FOR IT EVERY DAMN TIME.
And do you know what happens when you color outside of the lines with a bright red lipliner, folks?
You’re fucking doomed. Because you’ll try to correct in. Then smudge it further outside of the edges. Get it on your fingertip. Smear it over your cheek in a panicked attempt to lessen the smudge. Then grab a wipe and try to fix that mess, only to punch a hole in your foundation and from there it’s a slippery slope back into Joker-territory.
Guess who’s going to her (superplatonic!) kittencuddle date with a very pink glowy VERY freshly scrubbed face. Without lipstick?
Me. It’s me.
Cause I fell in the same goddamned old trap AGAIN.
But hey. I get to cuddle kittens. YAY KITTENS!
Can you relate?